homesick

i just feel so out of placed there nowadays
maybe its because ive been committing myself elsewhere
maybe its because im drifting from the people
maybe

it is no longer the same place
no longer the same laughs
no longer the same camadarie
i wish it were
so many times
i wish that we could live forever in a time already past
now there is so much going on that i dont feel like im a part of
so much i am critical about
so much i sneer at
the people there have either changed left, or moved on
i feel as if im trying to chase a rainbow
an ideal so fantastic its no longer real
trying to cling onto a hollow shell that has died out sometime ago

im starting to feel as if i belong elsewhere
ok maybe when i spend most of my time doing stuff for elsewhere
i should feel more my loyalties shifting
maybe

maybe its becausing I see and feel God moving in another place
moving through me that is...
maybe

maybe this place isnt home anymore.....

as entropy would have it
things change
people change
and all we are left with is an ideal
a dream
a memory
the spirit behind that which we cling onto so tightly
and when these slowly wither an die
what then?

think i shall end with a song
by mercy me

You're in a better place,
I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times
I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now