treasures hidden in jars of clay

i think i would like to take this time to thank the people who have really helped me through this past year
a transitional state,
hmm
dunno feel fake calling it that
i think falling away and struggling back stage sounds more appropriate
sometimes i wonder whether what i struggle with is legitimate or whether the manifestation of my schiznophrenic nature

hai
well that asside
thanks jason lee, dom, xingwen, lian, lingquan
maybe ud might ask what u've done but the truth is
when people around u struggle, we feel better
haahah
no really
asside from the sadism
the truth is when we see people around us being real with themselves
we're encouraged to do likewise
and perhaps
being real is something i have to work on

well perhaps i ahve highly overrated myself
but nvr mind
haha
strange
i started blogging honestly with an exhibitionist nature
ahha
but as time when by
and as i realised that only a handful read my blog
haha
if u look at the counter, probably 300 out of 700 are me revisiting my blog to check if the upload works
haha
but ya
there was a hiatus when i didnt see the point in blogging
now i blog because i find it hard to pen down stuff as when in my handwriting, things dont look as meaningful
ahhaha

no really
anways, as the bible says

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us. 2 cor 4:7

Pero tenemos este tesoro en vasijas de barro para que se vea que tan sublime poder viene de Dios y no de nosotros

sorry, im fascinated with spanish, not that i noe how to speak it
but anyways
reminded that in the end we are the vessels
and the more plain we are
i guess God works best
haha

maybe im comforting myself
since i find myself so plain
haah
well
i guess im not alone
maybe lonely
or maybe jealous of others who can socialise better
but ya
at least God is there for me
although i cant say the opposite is true
hai

but i think i must thank God
for knocking down my house of cards
and letting me realise how much of my faith was just hot air
before i really got burnt
well
enjoy the song
its my favourite