just so the old one knows,
ive been using the only birthday present i ever recieved from you,
and yeah....
i think i learnt something today....
usually id prefer to claim to have been reminded of stuff rather than having learnt
cause yeah, it conjurs the mental picture that i know alot?
but im learning that i have alot of knowledge, but i dont really know alot

so yeah

anyways, todays study was on jonah(i know ive posted on him before)
and yeah i think i learnt that God never allows us to give up?

ive always been under the impression that God is omniscient and omnipotent
but ive always thought that i held the self destructive "give up" button
i guess the awesome/aweful thing is that for those of us who give our lives to him
we dont even have full control of that

i was reminded of several other things
one being how pagans(non-christians- im using this as allegory, not that non-christian= pagainsitc) many times put us christians to shame in the directness and simplicity of their faith, or how they apply and live out what they believe...
we're the ones in above our heads, believing in one way of life
but falling so much short.

i was also reminded how as much as people preach how we should bring the right attitude and intentions to God when we pray, essentially the "right" way/things to pray
the truth is that this isnt/shouldnt be
God wants us to come to Him/before Him
even if its for the wrong reasons
so often we've taught new believers to come to God first, not focus on changing
but we dont practice that ourselves
even if our prayers are self-serving, about how pissed we are, or how much we need financial success
i think better bringing these to God then not at all

for those who know or dont
i think the previous year was amazing
really like a storm shaking my boat
i think ive learnt so much more about love
not some mushy concept
but the real backbone of christianity

theres so much i d want to say about it
but so little i think im entitled to say

my resolutions for this year we're now into
to know God more,
and to know His love and grace
and hopefully to learn to respond to these in a more deserving way