“Do you also want to go away?”

For those who dont know, or are not familiar with NKJV
that was quoted from John 6:67 and if ur bible is any good, those words would appear in red

I'm beginning to consider the distinct possibility that all this discontent, this stirring, these labour pangs as some would deem it is possibly because ive wandered away from Jesus

no ive not joined some cult, or embraced satanism
ive not engaged in hedonism, wild druken orgies and all that

sometimes i wish it were as simple and clear cut as that

its queer
sometimes we can do all the right things, attend church, cell and bible study,
serve all over the place
pour out ourselves again and again
and still in the midst of all of it wander away from Jesus

not that ive managed to do all of that stated above
i church hop, i dont have a cell, nor a group bible study and im serving er myself
but my point in case is this
our religious piety doesnt stop us from wandering away

innocuous activities such as service and fellowship
sometimes are harmless enough that they manage to seduce us away from our proper intent

i guess somewhere along the way i got a bit preoccupied with my self, certain others and other things
and forgot that being a christian isnt about attending church or serving or even evangelism
sure it is bound to involve those things
but its supposed to be about Gods love, and us trying to react appropriately to something as overwhelming as that

it holds some truth, even though sounding far fetched, that the day we're not overwhelmed by God
is probably the day when we've lost the plot
humbling to consider that ive lost the plot so often

i guess it is good that ive been feeling discontent and suffocated
to not feel that way, even when something as imperative as the tenet of my faith isnt at the core of what i am, and what i do
mmm
that would be really something else

i guess Simon Peters reply was quite trite
to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life

there is no other way,
there is no other

we may wander away, get caught up in things we know wont satisfy
kill ourselves and drag down others chasing illusive dreams, and noble creeds
but at the end of the day
there is no where else we can really go

im sorry that i dont have answers that really answer anything
i wish things were easier and more clear cut
i wish the problem was less subtle
and the answer less metaphysical
but i dont have or know any other